feeling rough, falling hard, failing often, fearing everything, finding  blessing, fiximg me.

This morning just feels rough and crazy as my mind races with issues that I need to resolve, personal frustrations that I need to correct and difficult situations that I have created for myself of which I see no end. Bills, relationships, employment, failures, love, loss, enjoyment, fufillment, and purpose are all tugging at my mind and heart to gain an audience and their combined weight has become so encumbered that I have become just short of crippled.

Sitting here on this July 4th on a bench in Atlantic Station, I realize that nothing can be resolved by only dwelling on negativity. I also know that ignoring a problem only leads to greater and more deeply seeded problems. I need to recognize and tackle what is frustrating without allowing obstacles to become irreversible.


Today, I will first acknowledge the sea of endless blessings, opportunities, successes, and second chances that have been so graciously and continually evident in my life. I will not carry-on as if my life is terrible and dark. I will recognize that there is legitimate struggle and deep hurt being experienced by people all around me and that my small world is a mere droplet in a sea of human struggles, dreams, challenges, aspirations,  defeats, hirt, need, desire, and success.


Life’s difficulties only become more problematic when not met and/or challenged by a solution or “fix”. I must address and no longer ignore my personal problems. If I have a bill due-I must work to pay the bill. If I have a personal frustration, I must evaluate its truth and work to correct to eliminate what os frustrating. I must do roght where I have wronged. I must succeed where I have failed. I must give where I have taken. I must do better where I know better.


I must be real about my problems and solutions. I must be realistic about my capabilities, solutions, and opportunities.


…to be continued

I know I’m already feeling better by focussing on positivity and solution.